SlimStacey

Eating the Crust First...On Your Workout?

"She's my cherry pie/Cool drink of water such a sweet surprise/Tastes so good what a sweet surprise/My sweet cherry pie"  Warrant--"Cherry Pie"

Oh, who doesn't want to harken back to the Eighties (for those of us alive then) and enjoy some good old fashioned Warrant?  Break out your bandanas and banana clips, everybody!  And what a great quote to post for this blog entry, too!  Seriously, I have to share with you a tip that's so common sense about weight loss, it's almost stupid for me to say it...but hey, it's still a bit of an epiphany all the same.  Here goes:  There were a few days there that I had screwed up my courage to re-enter the workout game, and I would put on the workout clothes, strap on the special workout-only sneakers, etc. etc.  I'd have the workout DVD in the player, all queued up...and nothing would happen, because my son would run downstairs and demand my attention, or the phone would ring with a business call I couldn't avoid, etc. etc.  You know the drill.  Then you spend the rest of the day trying to find some time to get the workout done and...nope.  Doesn't happen. 

Well, what's been working for me the last two days is doing the workout first thing in the morning.  That's right...you can't go wrong by "eating the crust first," as an uncle of mine in Alpha Phi Omega used to say (long story).  Yep.  Eating the crust first means getting to something right away that you really DO NOT want to do.  For me, that's working out.  I'd rather work for ten hours straight then work out for ten minutes, especially now that I'm all flabby, Saggy Baggy Elephant of a Stacey.  So I'd try to work out in the middle of the day, because I had accomplished everything else that I wanted to do first and...surprise!  No time!  The day was in full swing and God knows what was vying for my attention. 

But when I've "eaten the crust first"--i.e., I get up, hit the bathroom, drink a bottle of water down and THEN start the workout--I notice that, shocker, I've actually managed to get the workout out of the way. It's so simple...but it works! 

So, perhaps if you've been caught in this same corundum, I've managed to impart a little common sense wisdom upon you this morning...whether it has to do with a workout or not.  Is there something you're avoiding that needs to get done?  Well, perhaps you have to just face the fear down and walk right through it to get to the other side.  I have...and...amazing...I've dropped two more pounds.  The scale read 160 pounds today.  Hello, 150's?  I'm knocking your goddamn door down, honey!  With gusto!

Working Up to the Work Out

"And daddy doesn't understand it/He always said she was good as gold/And he can see no reasons/'Cuz there are no reasons...."  Boomtown Rats--"I Don't Like Mondays"

Mondays suck in general.  I don't need to beat that to death.  But they suck all the more when you sell things on eBay and the auctions all end Sunday night (best time to have them end) and most everyone's paid for their stuff by Monday morning.  Yeah, the good news is the family's a little bit richer.  The bad news is, I need an hour to package everything up and get it ready for the post office AND I have a reply affirmation to put out for a client AND I have five other cases to work on today, do or die...and this is exactly the morning my son decided to get up two hours early (and he's a toddler, so now I have to be on him like white on rice to keep him safe).  How dare I have given myself Sunday off from working? I wonder.  It's usually work-work-work, spread across three jobs, seven days a week.  But I was so damn tired on Sunday...and that was my excuse for not working out then.

Monday, today, was supposed to be the day I returned to a schedule of working out.  Because I'm so weak from not having done it for a few weeks, I thought I'd try a nice ten minute workout (Tony Horton's Ten Minute Trainer) and at least I'd have done something.  I'd set up my workout water, the DVD was all queued up...I was ready to rock and roll as soon as I finished packaging up my eBay sales.

And then I heard, all at 5:30 AM, after having been up and working since 4:30 AM..."Mommy?" 

I froze.  No, it can't be...it's nowhere near 7 frickin' A.M....

But yet, there it was again:  "Mommy?  Apple juice?  Please?  Mommy?"

So there goes the ten minutes I was hoping to have.  The rest of the day is SHOT.  And yet....

If I don't at least do ten minutes' worth of working out today, I'll never get started again.  So, instead of taking a few minutes to rest my eyes between assignments, I'll fit that ten minutes in.  If that's all I can do today, that's all I can do.  Rome wasn't built in a day.  But when I breathed, "F*CK you kid" under my breath, my husband, who shambled out of the bedroom behind our two year old, heard me.  And I'm sure he used to think I was good as gold.  But, well, my mettle's been a bit tarnished...gotta polish it up, three jobs or no.  If I can shoehorn in ten minutes, so can you...so get cracking, my friend!  You don't want me ending up skinnier than you someday!

Bye Bye Bye

"Just hit me with the truth/Now, girl you're more than welcome to/So give me one good reason/Baby come on...."  'N Sync, "Bye, Bye, Bye"

Got a confession to make.  After having done so well and missing out on pigging out (and/or boozing out) New Year's Eve night, I slipped.  Yup.  My little sister and a friend of hers came over and we all started playing Epic Mickey (with my husband reading from the Player's Guide, because we're wusses like that).  We were having such a good time.  But before I knew it, we were at the convenience store picking up soda, bottled Starbucks Frappucinos, chocolate and chips.  Hello, slippery slope.  Fell right down 'ya.

But it wasn't all for naught.  I DID refrain from drinking any soda.  If I had done that, like any true addict, I'd have woken up this morning and drunk about a six pack of cans of Coke by 5:00 AM (I often get up anywhere between 3 AM to 4 AM)  I am BAD that way.  So I want to point out, in all fairness to me, that I did stay away from the worst addiction of all. 

That being said, I'm still a numb-nutz for having ingested all sorts of chemicals, fats and sugars someone who's overweight has no business eating.  At all. 

So, the lyrics chosen to accompany today's entry are appropriate...because guess what I threw out into what's left of the snow on my back lawn, for the wild animals to gorge on?  The leftovers from last night's gorge-fest.  Mind you, I live on a parcel of land that's 1 and 1/4 acres in size, and parts of it very wooded...so the spot I chose is one where the animals come by and scarf your offerings inside an hour; there's no litter, no waste, I promise.  All wrappers and packaging went in the garbage.  See, wild animals, they need fat to help them get through the winter.

I totally do not!

Now, some of you are ready to dismiss me and my blog and say, you are wayyyy too weak, Stacey.  Why should we come to your blog for advice and to be cheerleaded on by the likes of you?  Why?  Because I'm honest (and an honest attorney need not be an oxymoron, I always say).  EVERYONE has days like this! Everyone slips off the path and falls off the recovery wagon!  So, I'm sharing this momentary failure with you for an important reason--to say no one's perfect, and the past does not equal the future.  If you've slipped recently, you can share it with me publicly or privately, and I promise, there's going to be no judging on my part.  I won't be a hater.  Pot, kettle, you're both black.  There! 

Plus, my failing and sharing only strengthens my commitment to you, the reader:  I absolutely MUST return to 135 pounds or so...because then if someone with feet of clay such as I can do it (i.e., reach a goal weight), then there's loads of hope for you!  Failure, to me, isn't the end of everything.  It's a new beginning where you start of wiser than you did before.  If you learn the lessons offered to you in the experience of failure, you have a playbook to help you win the game of life and be a success.  So, bye, bye, bye junk food entering my home.  That's one thing I've learned here and now.  Ask yourself this question:  "What nasty failure, large or small, have I experienced this week?  What's the lesson I just need to learn?"  Now apply that lesson, you wise old owl, you! 

Too Legit to Quit

"Sweat running all over my chest I don't quit no/I just press harder, yeah, than I ever did before/Going for the dreams that I have in store in my mind and I know/That I'm makin' it I gotta get mine and nobody's taking it away"  MC Hammer--Too Legit 2 Quit

You know, I think that's a great set of lyrics to set off this fantastic year of 2011.  I don't want to jinx myself, but anything with an 11 in it is a lucky number for me.  So I take it that this is my year to shine.  Why shouldn't you do the same? 

I'm rather proud of myself.  As much as I announced on Facebook that I was going to descend into the pits of Health Hell by drinking alcohol and eating junk, but, other than eating chicken wings (and a whole lot of celery, no blue cheese or extra sauces) I ate no junk and drank only water.  True!

That's the thing--this year I'm truly committed to weight loss.  So much so that I actually gave myself and my 2011 recovery a head start.  And I'm not sorry.  No hangover.  No bloating.  My tummy's a little sad that I ate the chicken wings (I never eat them) but you know what?  It could be a lot worse. 

I have determination to succeed this year like you can't even imagine.  I'm done looking at myself in the mirror and thinking, Moo.  How about you?  Are you going to join me in my quest to lose weight and live a healthier lifestyle?  Trust me, we can all bitch and moan together, when need be.  And we can celebrate each other's successes.  If you comment about where you are in your process, I promise to be your cheerleader.  I'm only snarky with myself, never with someone who is trying so hard to do better. 

I hope you have as awesome and prosperous a 2011 as I intend on having!  Let's all get skinnier and healthier together!  Misery may love company, but look at things another way:  we all deserve to be in the Winner's Circle of Life, so let's all get in there and celebrate together!