A Pirate's Life for Me

"One word love:  curiosity.  You long for freedom.  You long to do what you want to do because you want it.  To act on selfish impulse.  You want to see what it's like.  One day you won't be able to resist."  --Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Carribean, Dead Man's Chest

I mean, if I'm going to look like a pirate, I might as well start acting like one, right?  This black pirate eyepatch really is horrendous.  But it's totally necessary.  It was worth its weight in gold when my son Steven Ames took a toy and bashed it, suddenly and unaccountably into my face.  Right towards the right eye, which couldn't have blinked or closed to protect itself otherwise.  I mean, he's one; it's going to happen.  Plus, the eye is photosensitive; and the vision is blurry.  I have a hard time seeing over the bandage contact lens covering my cornea anyway, trying to keep it from getting scratched any further than it already is. I have to put a thick eye gel over the orb at least once an hour, or the eyeball will wither and dry up. 

I know...EWWWWWWWWWWWW....

So far, it's staying moist, but it's pretty gross nonetheless.  Now, am I just being a big old complainer that more's the pity that this affliction didn't arrive before 10/31; I could have put on a nice pirate costume and gone Trick-Or-Treating with my son and not be totally stared at.  I mean, because now I'm just getting totally stared at.  In the doctor's office when I'm waiting to be seen.  At the Walgreens when I'm getting prescriptions filled.  By the Jehova's Witness who showed up at my door, and between the eye patch and face mask decided all on her own that now wasn't a good time. 

Really and honestly, I'll break this down piece by piece in shorter blog posts than yesterday's Odyssey (sorry about the length), but this Bell's Palsy thing is like a hydra with so many heads.  The eye manifestation is just one part of the fun.  PLUS, I'm additionally immuno-suppressed, so that's more so why I'm on house quarantine...for my good, not for society's good.  You can't catch what I have.  But I sure can catch everything you have.  Keep your swine flu away from me!

So, tune in tomorrow about how I'm supposed to heal this...and how YOU can avoid it, because though it isn't contageous, you still are apparently at an elevated risk of contracting it all on your own, darling!

Comments

[Mary Beth]

Oh, to have been a fly on the wall when the Jehovah's showed up...!!! I think that may have gotten you a permenant pass from further visits - either that or they huddled at the top of your driveway in fervent prayer for your face & soul. Face it, you are better prepared for the pirate's life than you can imagine - just throw one of the birds up in your shoulder & you are good to go! Kudos to you for keeping your spirits up and your sense of humor sharp & intact!!