"You don't know how to play the game/You cheat/You lie/You make me wanna cry." --10 CC, "Cry"
Now THERE'S a blast from the past!
And there's the exact words that perfectly describe how I feel, at times, in this whole weight loss struggle. I definitely feel like I don't know how to play the game. My mother joined Jenny Craig and in 2 months she dropped a whopping FIVE dress sizes. Yeah, not bad, right? I just don't have the $100 plus dollars a week to pay for such a privilege! We had to scrape up money just to have me return to Tae Kwan Do...and that doesn't start until September. And trust me, it's cheaper than Jenny, by far. But apparently, Jenny works, so I won't slam it unduly. My mother is ecstatic being a goddamn size four!
And I'm crying my eyes out because after trimming off a little weight, I can just now fit into the size 12 clothes that my mother was wearing when she started Jenny Craig. Oh, yes, before that who knows what size I was, especially at the height of my struggles just after I'd birthed my son (and just before that point in time, I weighed a whopping 203 pounds). Now, I'm mindful that other people may read this blog and think: Jesus, I WISH I was a size 12. There are others that are thinking, Size 12? Put her in a dairy farm with the other cows. But you know, the weight loss struggle is all a relative thing. There are people who want to drop that last ten pounds, which I hear is killer...yeah, let me have that problem, in the meantime. There are also people who feel my pain but in a smaller ratio: i.e., they're now a size 8 and want to be back down to a size 2. Me, I'd love to just return to my lifelong size 8, sometimes size 6 depending on the cut. I have a closet of clothes that I can't wear (which has now been moved to the guest room, faithfully awaiting my return). I've now gained a closet of clothes from my mother...and lest you think that means caftans and mu-mus, thank goodness, my mother works at the GAP, so although the clothes may be on the bigger size (for what I'm used to), they FIT and they're current in style! I just have to go to the mall to get some tops (she gave me a few dresses and, like, 50 thousand pairs of jeans and pants). At least I'll look better in those threads, because constantly dressing in the same few pairs of sweatpants/tees or sweatshirts/tees...well, it just doesn't fly anymore.
Comments